格格不入

格格不入，用来形容我的个性，应该非常贴切。

我不否认我的性格很难以捉摸，脾气很火爆，思想很怪异。我任性，我自我，我不善于社交，我不会说话，甚至说话都不经过大脑。

有时候我很恨自己，为什么把自己搞成这样，却不试着去改变。我不改变自己，却希望帮助别人，很可笑，不是吗？

一切，只能说是咎由自取。很想钻进属于自己那渺小的世界里。垂头丧气也好，发泄情绪也好，没人管得了。因为那个世界，是属于我的。

我的世界，你敢进入吗？

Pinoy Christmas songs

I hate Christmas this year, because I can't go back to my lovely 'homecountry' to spend Christmas there.

During such depressing moment like this, I shouldn't be listening to Christmas songs. But everytime I get to hear them, I have the urge to just buy the tickets and fly over right away. Argh.

Sharing with you guys 2 Tagalog Christmas songs, very touching. It has been sung by many artistes, but I can't find the music videos by the original singers.

I want my Christmas.

Pasko Na Sinta Ko (My darling, it's Christmas) - Christian Bautista



Sana Ngayong Pasko (Hopefully this Christmas) - Erik Santos

2 horrible weeks have passed

Finally, I could get to sleep without thinking of what would happen tomorrow. No more imaginations of worst-case scenarios. It has been exhausting, mentally and physically. It was much tougher this year, more people and problems to deal with.

Even if I had dealt with them badly or wrongly, mistakes have been made. Probably these coming weeks would be crucial, to see the effects of my mistakes.

At times like this, I hope to be away in my paradise. But paradise is nowhere near my reach, even for this coming Christmas.