identity crisis

everytime when i'm about to experience some identity crisis, i have to tell myself that i have to be sure of myself, i have to be proud of who i am and what i have achieved.

i don't like to compare, but sometimes, the reality is there. but it's ok, mind over matter. i am who i am, and i don't need to be someone else.

yeah, this is me. i don't care if you like me or not, i don't care if you think lowly of me. i don't give a damn to your opinions. as long as i know there are people out there who appreciate me for who i am, for what i am.

i'm special. take it or leave it.


P.S. this is not intended as a personal attack. just a general statement. :)

time is relative.

my colleague once told me that time is relative. some people find 24 hours not enough, while some may end up rotting their time away. and some are able to live it up to the fullest (but again, it's hard to define what is "fullest"..)

although i just had my Bangkok trip about a month ago, it seems like i've been back for ages. the workload is always there, and kids are getting just as annoying. ha. (5 is divisible by 2 and 3. my god.)

but of course, i try to give some time to myself, to my friends. during the past few weeks, i've met up with aline and waipeng the married couple, and i've just met up with my mentor and my job attachment partner at Singapore National Eye Centre. i enjoyed going out with myself while doing errands out on the streets. :D

i'm also trying to spend some time reading up on some stuff. hehehe. perhaps a step nearer to one of my dreams.

yeah, time is relative, and i think i'm getting along fine. for now. haha.

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HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY to Bong and Ryan! i know a lot of April babies, but i'm not saying they are not close to me. these 2 guys just happen to have the same birthdate! :)

Bong, Tambok as i always like to call him, is one of my closer friends in Philippines. although some things may have changed, but nevertheless i hope he remembers what i've been telling him, and hopefully, all things will turn out fine. that's my wish for you!

and Ryan, he's the father to my godson, so am i supposed to call him pare? haha.. he's also like a brother to me, not so much like Joseph, he likes to tease me and make fun of me, particularly fond of reminding everybody how ugly i look when i cried non-stop when leaving Bago City. but really, he brings laughter to people around him, making him so likable. haha. happy birthday, and of course, wishing you happiness, and take good care of my inaanak! :)

miss you guys!

another sad piece of news

i thought it was another 'prank call' from Philippines when i received another missed call. it started with the usual greetings and teasings, and i started asking about my Papa P's coffee table book.

then came this, from the other side of the phone, "did you know Joseph's mum passed away yesterday?"

first, it was disbelief. then sadness. somehow i was loss for words to continue the conversation, and i just abruptly end the call by saying i would call back again soon. sorry Temogen for that.

it was saddening because Joseph had lost his younger brother to a kidney illness some time last year. and now, his mum.

i did not ask about the cause of death, sounded impolite. it could be due to old age, which perhaps may be more consoling.

my dearest Joseph

Joseph himself is also coping with his kidney problems, it makes me kinda worried seeing him getting thinner every year i'm back in Bago. i look up to him as a brother, and i see the strength he has, and his positive outlook in life. be strong, Joseph, i know you are.

less time

i'm starting to lose inspiration to write these days. you can blame it on the crashing schedules (again), or the proposals and plannings that are draining my brain cells. of course i'm trying hard not to be harsh on myself, but sometimes, it can't be helped. ha.

and i've realised that i did not blog about the NUSCO concert last March, and there are still many interesting stories about Bangkok that i have not shared.

even though orchestra practices have stopped temporarily (reminded me of my school days, when it was supposed to be the study break, but i don't seem to recall if i had ever been that hardworking :P), my kids' exams are nearing. implying that i'll spend more time getting frustrated over their silly mistakes.

it's ok, as always, give me some time. i'll give myself some time too, to take a breather whenever i can. don't worry, i won't stop writing. i know there are people out there who have been reading all this while. i'm tough. :)

good rock

surprisingly, the previous playlist's theme - Dreamz FM - was a hit. :) i was a little taken aback when i was looking at the statistics from my imeem. haha. currently my top 3 hits are songs from Dreamz FM: Ni Zhou Ye Hao, Bu Zhi De and Shou Hu Xing. isn't that great? haha. Dreamz FM! woohoo~!

ok, playlist for April - good rock :)

i actually enjoy listening to rock music, good rock music that will set you grooving. yar yar, people say i look like those pathetic girls that only listen to sad music. but hey, a musician does appreciate a lot of different music genres ok? well, except heavy metal and techno. ;)

and yes, sometimes when i'm feeling down, i do listen to rock music. it has a therapeutic effect. haha.

anyway, this playlist is a little unusual. because i have so many favourites, i can't narrow down to only 10 songs (which all my other playlists do), so it's 15 songs this time round. and topping the list, is Blind by Lifehouse. seriously, i don't know why i like this song so much. i just like it the very first time i heard it, played by a band at a charity performance in school. another favourite, is Won't Go Home Without You by Maroon 5. haha, people in the office, and my Thai friends would know that i keep singing this song for the past few weeks. hehehe..

some songs are, of course, original pinoy music. hehe. Jay-R Siaboc's Minsan Lang, Chad Peralta's Song For You, Rivermaya's You'll be Safe Here, Cueshe's Borrowed Time.. etc.. i have a lot of favourite pinoy songs, if you wanna know. haha.

so groove to the music, and enjoy! =D

Bangkok photos

Bangkok 2008 (27 Mar - 31 Mar)

ok, photos have been uploaded.

i did a little research when i was doing the captions for the photos. it was actually hard work when you have to find the correct names of places unfamiliar to you, but it was rewarding too. i enjoy exploring the beauty of different cultures, and i've learnt a lot from reading travel guides. i do keep a mini travel log everytime i go overseas, and i enjoy sharing my travel experiences with people. perhaps i could work towards being a travel journalist. haha. i am dreaming.

then i would need to brush up on my language and photographic skills. ;)

but anyway, enjoy viewing the photos. :)